husband sometimes does not come home....

[CONFUSED2471607307658]

my husband and i have been married for a little over two years.. and we have two beautiful children together. yes we have had problems in the past and took a break from one another and during that time i hated him.. he hardly ever came to see our kids and i had to fight him tooth and nail for child support for the kids. after being separated for 9 months we thought why not give things one more try for the kids sake.

im now thinking why did i do this? i was doing really well on my own! the reason i left him was because there were times he would not come home for days at a time with out any warning. things would be going great.. no fighting or disagreements. he would just not come home after work. this went on for 4 years! but out of the 4 years he did it i would say...hmm..about 15 times.

now that we are back together and living as a family again.. he is back to his old games. at first it was good.. he seemed really dedicated to us.. but after being back with one another for 10 months now he has started to not come home again. i dont know what to think..

last night he went to a baseball game.. and i was gonna go with him.. but decided to give the ticket to my younger brother.. and he did not come home! the hole time i was more worried about my little brother who is 19 than my own husband. and now i find out that he did not go to work today either. thankgod my brother is ok.. i talked to him... he said my husband said he was going to a bar.. what do i do ? i want to know where is he? i called his moms.. she is the ice queen.. and says she has not heard from him.. and i called his dad..

please tell me what you think... ](*,)

[dcp456]

I think because you two are married, you are free to suggest you two go in for counseling(because YOU have some things on your heart that you want worked on in you alls RELATIONSHIP). if he cares about you and your feelings at all (and not just doing it for the kids), then he will at least consider it. this will tell you whether or not he's really IN marriage with you.. or totally lost. or worse. =(

so do that for yourself, and your marriage most importantly. because if you two can work this out together and get everything on the table to be looked at, talked about, and worked out... then it will be the best for the kids.

 

It's definitely worth the try. a mediator person can be a great thing. if YOU bring it up and show you are willing to work through WHATEVER he's up to and not telling you, then you have the upper hand and taking the high road. if he backs away and cowers if he's hiding something or whatever... then you know what's up and... you sholud then have the strength to stand up for yourself and say... "you know what, I am in control of my life and I'm not going to let you do this to my life and my kids."

 

 

Anyways, I don't want to upset you with anything I've said. I don't have experience with this but.. just thought I'd toss that out,what I thought and what I'd DEFINITELY do if i were in that situation. it seems logical to me.

 

Please keep me updated