xxYoure My Butterflyxx Posted June 20, 2007 Share Posted June 20, 2007 Hi everyone. You can read my other posts for the fuller story, but a brief version: dumped in december, had NC since start of this year, not on speaking terms, but tried a couple of times to talk to him on msn, and a couple of emails, but he didn't answer, and then blocked me, only to unblock me a few weeks later. I would like to try and reconcile... I tried to talk to him on msn recently, and, shock horror, he replied!!! I nearly fell off my chair!! We talked for a couple of hours, and neither of us mentioned anything to do with us (me on purpose trying really hard!! all i wanted to say was "i miss u so much, i want another chance, my life's empty without you, take me back!!!!!") and it went ok i think. he didn't give anything away, as to how he feels about possibly trying to reconcile, and it sorta sounded like he was trying to make it sound like he LOVES not having a gf (should i bring it up lol...and i think if i did bring up reconciliation he would say no) however he did say he never sees me around anymore..i don't want to read too much into that, but could it be that he possibly notices? (i have been avoiding him on purpose for a few months) and also asked about my supposed bf, (obviously someone has told him i'm with someone...i'm not). So there were no hints or anything, but there were a few suggestive comments/questions...and he didn't block me! lol baby steps! but...what now? Link to comment
Thfc Posted June 20, 2007 Share Posted June 20, 2007 I would say let him have some space. Don't smother him. Be aloof and unavailable at times. Just like you said, take baby steps. You've talked to him on messenger. Do that a couple more times, keeping it casual and carefree. Don't get bogged down in the possibilities and potentialsof a relationship. Next you need to talk to him in person, just a "see him about and say hi" thing. Do that a few times. The slower you take it the more chance there is of him realising and remembering what he's missing. Link to comment
xxYoure My Butterflyxx Posted June 20, 2007 Author Share Posted June 20, 2007 thankyou!!!! thats exactly the sort of thing i needed to hear. Take it slowly...thats what I'm going to try and do. I just feel so euphoric, we're actually talking again!! I really thought hed just 'go offline'. After 6 months of blatantly ignoring me on purpose, we're talking again! whew! calm down lol. Link to comment
Jeffrey2095 Posted June 20, 2007 Share Posted June 20, 2007 Hi YMB, Remember too, that he is operating under the false impression you have a boyfriend... (Although, I would just let that impression ride for now, it may be working in your favor...) But I think overall you provided your own best answer: baby steps. I would just keep on as you are doing and let things slowly develope, as they will. Good luck Jeff Link to comment
xxYoure My Butterflyxx Posted June 20, 2007 Author Share Posted June 20, 2007 Thanks!! I was talking about one of my friends, he said to me "whos this *name* fella?" and i said "what *name* fella?" and he said "duno I don't know him" then i said I'm talking about *friend* and he goes "ohhh" so i didn't really tell him I didn't have one, but I didn't admit to it either, just acted a bit confused lol. He disappeared offline without saying goodbye, should I send a quick email that says something like "was good talking to you again, ill see you round, might have a dance with you one night" (we had been talking about how we dance when we're drunk lol) or should I just leave it? Link to comment
in_love Posted June 20, 2007 Share Posted June 20, 2007 sorry to say this but you are setting your self up for possible MAJOR heartbreak... you are obviously not over him!!! this: "shock horror, he replied!!! I nearly fell off my chair!!" says so! What if he doesnt want anything? what if you crumble under frustration and start "asking"? I hung on for MONTHS - talked and tried the whole game playing c**p! DOES NOT WORK! - beware of game playing and "tactics", they m,ay give you a "quick fix" but ultimately there will be a very likely chance that it goes down again! In my opinion (which is all it is) it would be better for you to completely get over him first BEFORE trying to reconcile, you want a new start not a resume of the old relationship! Not only will you be in a much better place, your chances of a successful reconciliation will be much higher!!! But thats not what you want to hear, is it? Link to comment
xxYoure My Butterflyxx Posted June 20, 2007 Author Share Posted June 20, 2007 thanks for your opinion, i appreciate it, but I just want to be clear that, I am over him, pretty much anyway. If nothing comes of this, I won't be devastated or anything, sure maybe a little disappointed, but I'll be ok either way. I'd be ecstatic if we reconciled, but I can see life without him. I would NEVER try to resume the old relationship, especially now that I see all my faults, and the part I played in its demise, I would only ever want something new, and would make that abundantly clear to him. The "shock horror, he replied!!! I nearly fell off my chair!!" was only exteme surprise. I really wasn't expecting him to, and as I pressed send, wondered why I was bothering. Just got slightly taken aback when, sitting there waiting for him to go offline, he actually said "good thanks, how are you" Link to comment
Jeffrey2095 Posted June 20, 2007 Share Posted June 20, 2007 Thanks!! I was talking about one of my friends' date=' he said to me "whos this *name* fella?" and i said "what *name* fella?" and he said "duno I don't know him" then i said I'm talking about *friend* and he goes "ohhh" so i didn't really tell him I didn't have one, but I didn't admit to it either, just acted a bit confused lol. He disappeared offline without saying goodbye, should I send a quick email that says something like "was good talking to you again, ill see you round, might have a dance with you one night" (we had been talking about how we dance when we're drunk lol) or should I just leave it?[/quote'] Oh, I would agree with Thfc. I would just leave it for now as is. Don't want to appear desperate, and you don't want to act on impulse. Take a little time to breath (and think) between these baby steps. Jeffr Link to comment
xxYoure My Butterflyxx Posted June 20, 2007 Author Share Posted June 20, 2007 I would leave it for now. Oh, I would agree with Thfc. I would just leave it for now as is. Don't want to appear desperate. Jeffr Thanks. Exactly Link to comment
Burb Posted June 20, 2007 Share Posted June 20, 2007 I can't say anything that hasn't already been said, but good luck. No matter the outcome, you will be fine. Link to comment
xxYoure My Butterflyxx Posted June 20, 2007 Author Share Posted June 20, 2007 I can't say anything that hasn't already been said, but good luck. No matter the outcome, you will be fine. Thankyou! Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.