So I broke no contact after 2 days, two days ago. I posted on here saying that my ex texted me telling me that he had internal bleeding. It was so hard, but I fought the urge to respond. Then later that night he blew up my phone telling me how he's scared for his life, couldn't get out of bed, and that he could eat the wrong thing and die, etc. I eventually responded saying, "I'm sorry. I wish I could help you. And I was going to leave it at that. Then he continued to text me saying, "Me too. Karma's a * * * * * , I guess." I didn't respond. He kept texting, feeling sorry for himself. Sent me a picture of how he looked, then apologized for bothering me.
I texted back, trying to end the conversation by saying, "I'm sorry. I really hope everything turns out okay. Good luck." He continued on blowing up my phone and said, "I can't wait to leave earth behind. The only thing good here is gone now now because I pushed it away." I didn't respond. Then he said, "I'm sorry. I won't bug you anymore because I doubt you want to talk to me. Well love you, glad to see you're enjoying life and being happy. I responded after that because I didn't want to lose every possible chance. So I said, "I love you too. Try and get better, you have people here that would miss you. Goodnight." He then responded with a " " face.
The next day I couldn't help but text him. I don't know why. I made first contact telling him, "Good luck with your scan results." He said that he was glad to see me happy and I , stupidly, told him that I wasn't all happy, just learning to be happy differently. I made a little joke and he sent a sad face. I told him that we used to smile about it and he replied saying, "I wish I could, but the good memories hurt." I told him, stupidly again, "You're the one who wanted to make them memories. So smile and make the best out of it. The memories I have with you are some of the best that I have." Then hours later he responded saying, "Not possible." I didn't reply.
So today he texted me saying, "Glad good is coming to you... You deserve the world!!!" I haven't replied.
I'm so confused. He played with my heart during the break-up. I don't know if he wants me back or is just trying to hold on to a piece of me, but not the whole thing. I truly want to get back together, but if not, I'm trying to heal myself. I don't want to ruin my chances by no contact if he inf act wants to get back together.
I don't know what to do. Any advice?