CarnelianButterfly

Have you ever had to deal with a person with a severe mental disorder? Have you ever sat with someone who was suicidal and tried to tell them that killing themselves was not the solution? Have you yourself ever been beaten by someone and made to feel it was your fault? You may feel they are "playing" but most of them are not. You can have no concept of the mental anguish and suffering that is involved with being abused unless you have suffered through it. To you it seems so cut and dry, but that is from the perspective of someone on the outside. You obvious have no concept of what it means to be abused. The whole purpose of abuse is to destroy the person, to make them your submissive and to truly reign over them. Its all about power over that person and once someone has established that power, it is not just a matter of one day waking up and saying "I think I'll get over this today" and hoping out of bed and walking out. It takes great amounts of courage and support form others (and telling someone "Ok, well screw ya, get therapy already" is by no means supportive). There are people in this world that will never have the willpower to be their own person, its part of who they are. You are as equally annoying whining about whining done by people who really do have the right to whine because of the crap they've been through.

I don't mind the idea of using sexy to describe someone you're fairly intimate with, but aside from that I do agree it is overused to an extent, but its not just by men its by people in general. I think it has a lot to do with the more open view society is starting to take of sex and sexuality. But like most words when used in proper context "sexy" can still have great meaning if the understanding is there. You mentioned guys not liking being called baby, well as a woman that would be an insult even to me for anyone but my Mother to call me that. The implications of being called baby again go back to the meaning and connotations that come with the word. It maybe a term of endearment for some, but for others it can seem degrading.

For one, there are those that are victims and can not break free for reasons beyond just wanting to. Children that are abused have no way to get out of their abuse with out a rescuer. They are at the whim of their abuser because they are powerless. There is a lot of shame and pain involved in being the victim of abuse. You are not only physically beaten but you're psychologically tortured. There is no amount of personal resolve that can free you from the utter betrayal you feel when attacked by a loved one. If you think staying with an abuser is a sign of playing the victim you are so horribly wrong and have no understanding of the true destruction a person's mind goes through when you're beaten day in and day out. You fear your abuser, but that fear breeds even greater fears of what horrors lie beyond your little world of pain. The pessimism and self-hate make the world all around you terrifying and cruel beyond all imagination.

No keenan I don't think these are the kind of guys that would slap each others butts unless there was football field involved. They're porbably as homophobic as they are gynophobic.

Love is tearing me apart

I have taken the time to read his post and others from him as well, specifically this... The things I have put in bold face are very much signs of disrespect. Argue all you want, but tell me how would you feel if you were standing next to your wife and she unabashedly watched the pool guy clean out the filter?

For one thing women's suffrage started over a hundred years ago and for another women don't need men. We don't need providers, we don't need chaperons, we are very capable of caring for ourselves. If you feel date rape and sexual harassment by men, is not their fault, then who's it, it isn't the woman's, no woman will ask to be raped (no is no and it is rape even if you buy dinner) and no woman asks to be verbally abused and treated like little more than a walking baby mill. Why is it so horrible for society to finally embrace half the the population of the planet? And why is it for all the feminiztion of our society that women, who have always been forced to feel guilt for sexuality, must now continue to be repressed?

Thank you so much Shy. That is the truth of the matter. For all the confidence speak, little has actually been said about respecting the women you're so fixated with coercing into going out with you. Respect is a large part of confidence, for all your self confidence it means nothing if the woman has no respect for you. One of the best ways to get the respect of others is to treat them how you would be treated. That doesn't make you a doormat, it makes you considerate, most women would rather have a considerate man than a guy that feels he's the most important thing in the relationship.

So in turn then by expecting women to accept you for who you are, you should accept women for who they are. That means seeing us as people and not some goal for your little confidence boosters and mental kicks. Why don't you try explaining what happens after you get the woman, how do you maintain that relationship? Confidence isn't going to take you all the way. You need to understand compromise, communication and the fact that your partner is an individual with there own ideals, goals, and dreams that they have every right to peruse.

He seems to have little respect for women beyond that of them being a means for him to get off. This is a very big red flag, this guy is bad news. If he lies to all these other women and is willing to violate to privacy of others think of how he may come to treat you. I don't think you should marry him and I think he needs to get help. If he continues to act like this he may get arrested or it may escalate to more serious offense against women, rapist usually start as peeping toms.

No make-up and the hair gets a washed, dried and brushed.

I'd rather have a guy looking me in the eyes when I'm talking to him. I hate it when they do the none too subtle boob, butt, leg look. 9 times out of 10 all it does is make me feel like the guy is a leering fiend and I'd rather be elsewhere.

Washing a truck.... Why buy a truck then, they should come with mud splatters on them already. My dad was the same way with his new truck, he pitched a fit when my Mom and I asked if we could use it to get mulch. He wanted to keep the bed clean, we stole the keys anyway and hosed it out when we were done. Some how he never noticed... hmmm...

My uni had a serious issue with a huge number of cheaters in one class last year, they would have had to expel over 400 students, they decided that this would have been a huge media storm so they just lowered all the grades by one letter. I think it would have made some waves, but they should have at least put them on academic probation.

My theory is that individuals that cheat in classes that are for majors such as engineering, physics, math, or science are doing the world a disservice. Because what happens when they get out into industry and have no idea what they're doing. That's how people die, planes crash, bridges collapse, all due to some miscalculation or flaw. There are reasons we have to learn our skills, we build the world, our work has to be right.

I was taking a class in differential equations my soph year of college, I spent over a week studying for the exam. I had to really work hard at it because I have a terrible memory, but I spent the time to do it. Several students had to take the exam a few days early because there was a conflict with another class, so the prof had us meet at his office. While waiting for the prof to get the papers I noticed one of the girls waiting had her sleeves pulled down over her hands, IT WAS SWELTERING HOT and I'm cold blooded even. When we got to the room to take the exam the prof left for a few moments, the sleeves went up and there up to her elbows were scrawls in bright blue ink! I finished my exam 1st in the group and took it the profs office, I closed the door behind me and told him what I saw. He was such a kind guy and the look of disappointment on his face was so marked that I felt worse telling him than knowing she had cheated. I never saw that girl in class again , but I struggled through the course and got a 'B' on my own merit.

You are committing an act of dishonesty and like I said many times grades are scaled to the performance of the whole class. If you cheat you give yourself a boost that may knock others down in the standing, you don't hurt just yourself, you hurt the grade of every other student. I consider any dishonesty a severe transgression and cheating is dishonesty.

If she dumps her BF for you, then I would have serious issues with her integrity as a person and as to the possible future you could have. Think about the trust issues that may raise in the relationship, if she is willing to dump someone for the purpose of another's attentions then she could do it again. It sets a poor precedent, wait for her to either break up for a more valid reason or move on to green pastures.

Never, I consider it to be as low as cheating on sig others. I've reported several cheaters as a student and had to discipline a few as a TA. Cheating is a serious act of dishonesty and as most class grades are based on your performance in relation to your classmates it is a wrong against them as well. Academic dishonesty has become a serious offense at many schools, evidence of cheating is grounds for expulsion and I have no qualms about reporting anyone.

I liked a guy that had the same name as my brother and it did weird me out a little. But the guy was nothing like my brother so I got over it.

Special is a nice way of putting it...

I think a mid-ground is more what I would believe in. You don't always have to have your hands on the wheel for the car to go in a straight line, little bumps will require some steering, but no white nuckled drivers for me! You can give a relationship direction, but it should be so that both parties working together. Ahh, my angry faces got booted , they were so cute. This ones my fav, it looks like a guy I knew, he could always make me laugh.

I say just go to the class to have fun, who cares what they think. I had female friends go to dance classes to pick up guys, its a social interaction where you can meet people some will be single some won't, just enjoy the lessons and wear comfy shoes.

Yep, but I'm still remain who I am and just take their opinions as input that gets scaled depending on how much I feel they know of me as a person.