AlexWindhall

I admit it. After some soul searching I can see it’s over. Not much to say. I caused it. I ***ed up. Yes it hurts but I need to let her go. Wishing her all the best and happiness. Sorry I hurt her so badly. My only way of showing her I am deeply sorry is to walk away and let her live her life and lick her wounds.

It was her BF who flexed his muscles I’m sure

I’ve tried to reach out last night to say goodbye to her and let her know I am sorry and I love her. Her response was, well I suspect it’s her boyfriend. A whole buns of cops came knocking to my door to the point almost ruining my door. 3 cops cars with blue lights and 6 officers shouting I have to stop and next time I’ll be arrested. WTH. I love now illegal. I don’t think it was on her but her new BF who called in a favour.

Funny enough your post is the one that rings through. My ex gf was just a fling. Currently she involved with another married man. My ex wife is dating a cop. Me, well I lost it all

I will continue to wait. Not to concerned her new BF and his work mates. They are only cops. Are they really going to make my life that miserable because of her. Nah

I will respect her feelings. I will just have to wait for her. Her new relationship may not last. I was her first biggest love

I will wait for her

UPDATE. I need to back off. My girl is defo done. Today I had the cops coming to my house stating. You need to stop contacting her and if you don’t you’ll be arrested for harassment Feel gutted 😞

Thank you. So nice kind words. I know I messed up but I’m not a bad guy.

Oh I heard her loud and clear. I pained me what she said. She was crying yet focused on making sure she said it all. I can’t let this be done and over with. No without her at least seeing me for the new man I am and how deeply sorry I am. I have cried to her and said I am so so sorry for the pain I caused. Our call ended with her stating. I can’t do this. You’re too late, you broke us. She also said. You really have to stop this now, or I will have to get a restraining order or get the cops involved. We went from love to this. Also I have found out she is dating a police officer. Hand on heart he’s a good looking dude, I don’t know know him, but know of him and he’s a good guy. Damn I really messed this one up. My mom would turn in her grave.

Another upsetting evening. Spoke to my ex-wife. She spend most of our conversation stating below: You decided not only to discuss me behind my back with your ex, rather than coming to me. Your ex who became my really good friend. I lost two people that day you cheated. Her and you ruined several peoples life. Our marriage. Her marriage and her kids life. You broke our wedding promises to each other. You regardless despite knowing my feelings towards cheating went ahead hoping to blame it on me. You ruined everything in our marriage, our life, our home, our love, you BROKE me. Yet when that *** didn’t show up at the hospital I was willing to forgive you and work on our marriage yet you rejected me. From day one your life was chaos and filled with people hurting me and you did nothing, except you became the one who hurt me the most. Now when I can offer you a friendship including forgiving the hurt you caused me you want me to start again with you. All you can offer me is insecurity, self doubt, suspicion and fear. I am saying no this time. Not because I don’t love you but because I am strong enough to love me more. I am done. You had your chance to fight for me and you didn’t. You let me go like I was trash and now you had your fun I am here to save you. No I am done. With the biggest love for you I suggest you sort your *** out because you have a right to be happy with your life. That’s the conversation. I am gutted. She really is done. What the *** have I done. What can I do. I am starting to believe nothing. I am really down. *** I lost the amazing girl

I totally understand everyone’s feedback but I can’t let her go. I am happy to wait for her. She’s worth it. We were talking for a good few month’s and I think we would have gotten somewhere. She was honest and open and all was going well. She explained how deeply I hurt her and what a jerk I’d been. She said. Why didn’t you come and speak to me back then, I was your wife. AllI could say was I was to far gone but I was an ***. She told me she loved me deeply back then. She always had my back and she really did. As she said she never stopped caring for me but the love was broken. I thought we had a chance as she mentioned that she loved me still but was scared. Until clearly she said she couldn’t live in fear of history repeating itself and she had to walk away. I am gutted. This girl is EVERYTHING. So PRETTY and a massive heart of gold. Extremely smart. She’s worth me not giving up on her. I’ll wait and show her I’m here. She had a lot of dates after our divorce. She’s never or is short a few admirers but the thought of her being with someone else or being loved by someone makes me sick.

I don’t agree. Yes I cheated on her but some people get back together and live happily together. In time I can show her how sorry I am and I can be trusted. Give her full access to everything. I made a mistake that’s all but people change. she said she still loves me and don’t want to punish me for the past but just can’t engage in a “new” life together. But who says not in time. I know her better than anyone else. I understand how to love her even when her trauma from her rape comes back up. I can be there like never before. I am not saying all on my terms. I know she’s moved on. Bought her own house. Had a high paid job. All going well for her. I give her that, she deserves that.

You could be right. I really ***ed up. She seems okay but to broken towards me 😞