Stranger333

Thanks everyone for the responses, I appreciate it 😊 But yeah because I know he wasn’t doing this behind my back and knew I’d get notifications, I don’t think it was anything more, but I can’t help the fact that it bothers me. I want to set some sort of boundary before he starts thinking this is something I’m okay with in a relationship, but I want him to understand where I’m coming from. It feels weird to me that my boyfriend gives his contact details so easily to women he’s just met at pubs, he was drinking and I know he was somewhat tipsy when he asked them. The night before me and his had gone out to a bar, after my birthday dinner, and some guy started talking to him, just asking him how his night was going etc, and they were just having casual banter, lasted about 5 minutes and then the guy carried on dancing with his group and my boyfriend with me, saying it was nice to meet you have a good night. At no point did they exchange contact details, I don’t know, I just don’t understand the need for him doing that with these two women. I tried to talk to him about it but it was very brief, due to him being busy preparing to go abroad etc, but I always flip it and ask if he would be okay if I did the same, he said well I know how guys are, and if you were out and some guy asked you or vice versa, then the guy most likely would be hitting on you or thinking you’re interested, saying that most guys are like this and that these girls aren’t.. it’s just that I KNOW he wouldn’t like it if I did the same, and I never would because I would feel uncomfortable in that situation and feel as though I’m giving off single vibes. He’s back from working abroad tomorrow, and I just want to get my mind straight about this so I can have a conversation with him having thought things out. But I’m not sure how to approach it with coming across accusing, because I already know he wouldn’t be okay if I was going around doing the same.

yeah the whole wife material thing made me feel very uneasy, it wasn’t just her ethnicity but he thought his friend would find her attractive, which obviously means he did to some degree, and that she seemed like good vibes. It bothers me because I feel him wanting to try set his friend up with her was also him thinking those things of her. His friend made it clear he wasn’t interested, but he proceeded to talk to her after that. We are logged in to each other’s Instagrams on our phones, and also use each other’s phones freely. I got a notification when the girls responded, and that’s when I questioned him about it.

Just want some perspectives: My boyfriend went to a pub with his brother to watch the euros final, where they both met a girl and were hanging out with her and getting to know each-other, and then exchanged instagrams before leaving. Both my boyfriend (obviously) and his brother have girlfriends. Then on their way home, they were asking for directions, and the girl they asked they recognised her being from the pub, and started making conversation with her, and she travelled with them by tube for a few stops, and my boyfriend asked for her instagram before she left to keep in touch, his brother didn’t add her. He later told me that because of her ethnicity, and his good friend looking for a wife of the same ethnicity, he thought this girl could be “wife material” for him. He didend up showing his friend photos of her, and his friend wasn’t interested. But that in itself really got to me, the fact he thought she was attractive or had wife qualities…worthy enough for his good friend. I’m okay with my boyfriend making conversation with people whilst he’s out in public, it’s only natural, but I’m for some reason really bothered by him taking it a step further to giving out his instagram to these women. Few hours later/ the next day, he messages them telling them it was nice to meet them and asking if they got home okay, and then starts a conversation basically. This is really bothering me. I’m unsure if I’m being unreasonable for being upset by this, as my boyfriend didn’t think this would bother me. He’s abroad for work at the moment, so I haven’t really had a chance to properly speak through my feelings with him about this, but he’s since just stopped responding to them, by has kept them on instagram. Part of me feels controlling and another feels like surely no other girl would be okay with their man giving out his contact details so openly to random women he meets? I don’t want him to feel trapped or controlled, and I’m afraid of doing this, but I also don’t want to feel this bothered.. any takes on this? Suggestions on how to handle this situation?