faraday

I suck at knowing what to say. I'm sorry this is happening to you. ((((Hugs))))

Lol. No kidding. Jay says the worst thing possible every time...idk how he does it lol. I try to look at what his intentions are when he says things, it works a lot better that way

Good god, that's appalling. Everyone should be able to save....save for a big purchase (maybe he wants to buy an apartment at some point) or save for retirement...wth government?!?

That would be incredibly frustrating. Is there any way to set it up through the bank so that his expenses come out right away, and set it up so that he has two savings accounts...one that he can't access, that's like a long term savings account, and another that's for mid month that he gets on the 15th of the month? It's so hard. Sometimes it's like the people that made rights didn't think it all the way through...everyone is unique...and we can't treat everyone the same. We have to protect them from themselves.

I know it must be so frustrating for you...but omg, I laughed. Your son is awesome. I like people that tell it like it is- and he is. I wish more people had the ability to just say their truth. Eventually...People learn to "fit in"....either we learn it because we learn to empathize with others, or in your sons case, he will learn because he won't like the hassle it creates when he makes waves. He'll get it eventually. In the meantime...you can drink wine I struggle with the balance of rights. For people on the autism spectrum...yes, they need to have rights and be protected. Sometimes though I wonder if part of that is taking away some rights...idk. I worked with a young woman that had some kind of mental impair (it was never explained to me further than that), and she was gorgeous. And high functioning enough to hold down a retail job. She needed me (workers) because she had problems with her temper, impulses....relationships. Like she was "dating" a guy (he was a using loser, but I couldn't prevent her from dating him) and hey would go to hotels to have sex, she would pay for the hotel because he wouldn't get a job...and he asked for her credit card on multiple occasions, and she would give it to him. He racked up over $16,000 on it. What an as$shole! Nothing we could do because she gave him the card, and her pin. And I asked why she had a cc. It's her right. And I get that...but I felt like...we needed to protect her....she wasn't responsible enough for a cc...probably won't ever be. She can and has gotten into a lot of trouble with that card. And apparently it's happened before. I know that my argument is in an abstract way like blaming a rape victim for wearing a short skirt. I get that. And I think her guy should have been held accountable. He was a user, a con artist...but the law was protecting him. I think that we needed to protect her...and not having a cc would have prevented a big piece of that...once he realized she had no money, he would have moved along. Idk. I struggle. Then there's my cousin. She has schizophrenia. She was doing really good- she was on her meds...got a job, had an apartment...for years she did great. Met a GREAT guy. Got married. Got pregnant. Went off her meds....and we can t get her back on them. She's loaded with conspiracy theories and fb rants. The court has made it so she can only have supervised visits with her daughter. She's now squatting in an abandoned house with some creepy old guy...she's lost everything. And we can t force her to take her meds. But if she took her meds for a month, she wouldn't want to go off them again- she could have her life back...the one with her child and husband. I guess things need to be individual. Rights and laws can't be blanketed...but who can we trust to decide what rights apply to each individual? People abuse power like that. Sorry for taking over your thread...these things have been weighing heavily on me lately as I watch my cousin struggle. It's so sad. She was a great mother.

I agree with BEG. I've dated a guy that said the exact same thing to me. He was very passive aggressive and extremely jealous...and that kind of stuff came out of his mouth all the time. You're going out with friends. That's allowed. It should be encouraged, actually. It's not like you're going speed dating, or to a swingers club. Just keep your eyes open...his comment made my hackles rise.

Have fun. See how it goes. You're right, any newish relationship should be taken day by day....and not everything is going to always be perfect. It's learning how to work through things that's the deciding factor on if it becomes a deal breaker or works itself out...until then, just enjoy the ride.

The jealousy thing...is so hard to be in a relationship with. I totally get it. And I'm sorry hopefully the next few weeks will give you a good indication as to more of how he reacts.

it's not always easy when you're still figuring each other out. Sometimes it takes time to learn how to disagree...to have different view points.

Lol I love you. I feel like many people are too emotional about things and tend to ignore the science. Science is there whether you believe it or not. It changes as new data is presented...it's not based on fear. But we suck at being impartial. All humans. We suck at being rational. Hence all the fear around causes for things. Even if vaccines did cause autism...I'd 1000 times rather have my child get autism than die of polo. But people are irrational idiots. We forget what it was like when families would have 6 children and only 2 would make it to adulthood. We are so blessed...and we have no idea.

Some people don't get that...in relationships you can "win" or you can be happy. There are times when things don't get fully resolved...it's an agreement to disagree....for the health of the relationship. I've been in a lot of relationships where there was "winning" and "losing"...jay taught me that there's no such thing...and he's shown me how to let things be gracefully, instead of feeling like things are hanging eta- and that someone needs to get the last word in. Silence and a hug feel better than the last word. I didn't know that before him!

He's a good looking young man, Vic. Very serious in that pic but he probably doesn't smile on command, hey? Was that a graduation pic?

Awww that's the cutest face ever! He's adorable Vic he's cheeks are so pinchable! Why do they have to grow up, hey?

So maybe make him a uniform now. Buy him 6 of his favourite shirts and 6 of his favourite pants, and tell him he can wear the same clothes every day they just need to be clean lol. My daughter does this too....but she's little. It doesn't bother her when there's pizza sauce on her sleeves. More character.

There are a lot of great minds that wear "uniforms"...aka the same thing every day. Mark Zuckerberg wears the same tshirt and jeans everyday (he has several of each so they're clean, but he doesn't have to think about what to wear). Einstein had a closet full of the same suit. Maybe your son doesn't want to think about what to wear? The Sheldon clip made me laugh

I think it depends on how it ended. I broke up with my daughters father and was dating the week after. It was over for a few years before I had the courage to tell him I was out. Why is this coming up now?

That is what I was asking That's funny! Sounds like he's good at hospitality...it's pretty rare for a man. Enjoy Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

I know you posted this a while ago, but did you make the rugs yourself? This is something I've always wants to try. Today I'm grateful for an empty house and caffeine. I didn't sleep well last night....so it's nice that things are quiet here. And it's nice to be on the board- I'm alone but I'm not. Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

I was joking...but it was a thought that crossed my mind...that maybe he was like a hotel for gfs He sounds like a good guy What are you calling him in here? Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

He's not smothering you and making you his life...so that's really awesome. Usually thoughtfulness comes with that feverish "must keep him/her" mindset, that creeps the hell out of the other person lol. He just sounds really thoughtful. I bet he'll be great at birthdays and anniversaries. Do you know that all this stuff is new and wasn't left by an ex? Lol Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

It's funny how that stuff works. Jay didn't even clear out a drawer for me to keep my toothbrush in until four months in...didn't have anything at his house that I liked until around 7 months when he finally clicked in that I'm a lot friendlier with coffee in the mornings...so he started buying me my favourite Starbucks instant coffee (because he didn't have a coffee maker). I would have killed for him to make more room for me in his life early on. But where's the tipping point where it's too much and starts to freak a person out? Well, probably close to where your guy is....some things show thoughtfulness, others show over enthusiasm....which can get overwhelming if you're not in the same place. And maybe you need to put it like that....I like your enthusiasm, but leaving me wanting a bit too...wanting is desire. Having everything is comfortable...which isn't sexy in the beginning. Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

I remember that thread, and I really love this update gives me warm fuzzies Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

I don't think I was aware that you had a journal...so I'm writing so that you come up in my feed now Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk