Alabama

I don't think it was neccesarily due to medication. Now that you're on a break, you have a chance to think, then do it. I'm sure you'll find the answer.

It sounds like your not ready for a commitment. You want to really get into the feel of life and see what great things it has to offer. I suggest just remain single and when you're ready to commit (maybe to this girl, personally) then do so.

Discontinue this friendship with this girl. She is being very mean and you deserve to have a better friendship with some other girl.

If they get embarrassed around you or are maybe very excited when they see you. If it seems they are "cold" to your presense as they don't don't anything that would seem like they attracted to you, they aren't.

I suppose it would seem to make all my other problems seem minisucle compared to having someone. I would have a bad day, but having a girlfriend would cheer me up, despite how bad my life might be at that point in time. But I'm thinking too emotionally. Nothing in life is in black and white. It never was.

I think it's a "my life feels complicated and I need someone to simplify it" kind of feeling.

I know that sounds sad, and that is how I'm feeling right now. In the past, my last year of high school, I was able to really feel like myself when I just decided to have fun in my life and that actually attracted some girls. But now as an RA, it feels like my only relief from my problems would be to have a girlfriend. I know that is not the answer and as of tomorrow, since I have lots of free time (2 classes instead of 4) to plan things out and recover from this and my grades in life. Does anyone know a way of concentrating on other things in life and not worrying about love?

She saying she's not interested.

I thought for the longest time I needed a part-time job to prove myself that I can do things successfully in life. I got a night time job working at my local residence hall. But the problem is I was getting lack of sleep from it. This started a problem when I missed several of my classes and almost had to withdrawl from a class, if it wasn't for the kindness of my teacher letting me stay in class, if I didn't miss another one. Yet then I told my parents I might have to withdrawl from a class and we went out to dinner to dicuss it. My mother "bit" my head off about this, even after I told my father earlier of my second chance. I broke down. We were eating in a restaurant and I cried right in front of them. I said it all was because of lack of confidence, but she insisted it was simply due to lack of sleep. Someone without confidence wouldn't have become an RA, like I am this year. I'm planning to quit this job, even though if I can go to class they'll let me keep it. But if it's cutting into my sleep this much, than it's not good for health. Sorry, I just had to get that off my chest.

Be honest with him. I know you won't, but don't "play" with his emotions. If this man likes you that much, that could be the worse thing to do. If you have no interest in him at all, then tell him this NOW. Before you regret it any later. He might be crushed by this, but he will recover. Telling him when you two have met up, is the best time. remember that.

You're being too hard on yourself. I am sure, even though she was sadly sick that night, really did enjoy your company. Don't think you don't deserve her. After all the efforts you've done, I am sure you do. Also she accepted your offer to go to this dance, so that must mean something, right? I don't think you should just stop seeing this girl, because of a dance that went lousy. You will have many better oppurtunites I am sure. Life moves in fluctuations. Just because something bad happens (like this dance, for example) doens't mean that it will always be bad. Don't give up hope so easily.

I don't intend to completely change who I am. Just better myself. I want to become more extroverted, but not to a point where it will completely change who I am. That's why I'm keeping track of my progress. So, I know when I'm swaying into bad territory.

Such negative views. Yes emotions handled the wrong way can make people do horrible things, but they can do good things. The world wouldn't neccesarily be a better place without them. You cannot simplify the horrible things humans have done by simply blaming it on emotions. Are you then to do judge nature for allowing us to evolve this far? Nature might correct this "flaw" as you call it, but what if it doesn't? Emotions are also motivation and allow us to get things done. They aren't "evil" or "good". Those are simply ideas and can be easily be altered.

Thanks everyone, especially Mr. Jones that advice definitely helped. I finally talked to her and suspected from her body language what I already knew...no attraction was there. I'm a little sad, but have recently started my own little personal journey to improve myself. This was a good time as a test to see if I could talk to cute girls I like...and I can. I'm happy with the way things are now and will work to improve myself, for 2 years, before dating. And at that time, I won't make the same mistakes like I have in the past.

...for the next 2 years (October 19th 2006-October 18th 2008) I will do nothing but work on improving myself. I won't date anyone (RA this year, and I'll be studying in Japan next year), but will instead become more extroverted. I will work on mentally and physically improve myself now. I will also try my best on improving my confidence on the way as well. I will even write a blog to keep track of my progress. I know there are no guarentees in life and I may not succeed at what I aim, but I think these are realistic goals. Life will go on as always, but I will look towards a better future for myself. I won't reach for perfection, but will simply be satisfied with what I can achieve in these next 2 years. Wish me luck!

Okay, here goes:

1. I am very kind. I know a lot of people say I am kind, and I am glad to be nice to people.

2. I am determined. I won't quit until I finish something.

3. I am open-minded. I don't discriminate and will think things out with a clear head.

4. I'm not lazy. I love to jog and hate to do nothing for long periods, as I could use that do something constructive.

5. I'm loyal. I am loyal to my friends and family. I care for them very much and would do anything for them.

I wish it were that simple. I chickened out again on Thursday, but I've looked her up on facebook and myspace. I know now some information about her, but am still unsure if I want to date now. I'm an RA now, a student, going to stuby aboard in Japan next year, and I work a night shift. It doens't feel like I have to go on dates, but I still want to. I've been trying to stay out of the dating game, but it's getting harder to just deal with it. I want to just live my life and improve myself, but I see this girl, as every other girl, as someone who will fill that void that seems like it's been missing these past few years. Is it this too much to ask for? I know I should work first on not being shy and attempt to build my confidence, but it's like I'm running out of patience for that to happen.

I feel the same way. I'm a perfectionist at heart and it feels like I have to be strong everyday or otherwise I'm a failure. I also suffer from low self-esteem and wonder how I'll also be able to solve it. But there's always hope, I'm sure.

Just ranting and asking. I am tired of being shy. I've been shy that I've known for the past 3 yrs. I'm tired of seeing a girl that interests me and either not doing anything or just not doing something for a long time. But what is a good way to approach a girl out of the blue and not be embarrassed? This happens to me anytime I talk with a girl I like. My heart beats real fast and my body flushes with warmth. I get nervous and don't know what to say at times. I don't freeze, but I get very uncomfortable. I don't want that to happen again. I don't why I get afraid, but I do. I want to talk to this girl on Thursday (she is in my geography class). I chickened out today (Tuesday) but am not going to Thursday. She did a presentation today, so I at least know her first name, so I can call out to her to get her attention. I'm just tired of being afraid.

The thing is they always poke my vein where my elbow is...so I can't bend that arm. 8 hours to take it off? I took it off at about 6 1/2 hours and it felt fine. But yah I did feel a little woozy after I donated the blood. And yes I am glad I've given blood. I hope being A positive definitely helps. I'm making sure to drink plenty of liquids and have been drinking water and plenty of juices. I've made sure to limit my pop intakes (as in very little). But yeah I am glad I did it.

Just a small gripe. I just gave some blood for the Red Cross and it is interesting how i will be one handed for several hours. also how it will take 120 days for my blood to re-supply itself.

Yes, I'm not a night owl. I go to bed early and get up usually pretty early, too (about 7am or so).

Okay, how am I supposed to adjust to different sleeping patterns? I have taken a night shift at my college in which I check people's I.D. for security purposes after 10pm-2am (or 3am on the weekends). I've felt so tired these past days. I don't have any 8am classes when I work and I only work once on Monday and Friday/Saturday. If I go directly to bed after I get off work and sleep for at least 7-8 hours will that compensate for staying up late like this working?

In these kind of situations it is best I think to lean on the side of caution. Sometimes we do want things to go back they way they were, but somethings aren't meant to be. I guess just keep being friends with her and see if she eventually changes. You don't want to seem persistent, as that can come out wrong. But if things don't change, than you may have to eventually accept the way they are. But don't give up hope, just yet.

Lack of love. But I don't want to vent. I'm someone who is very introverted and have never wanted for people to see me in pain or suffering. I can't have that. Somehow, I need to keep this inside...but it's getting harder. All I want to do is become fluent in Japanese, become a writer, and succeed at being an RA...but this damn want of love won't stop!! It's ruining my life...I need to find a way to make it stop. But venting won't work.