Dreams of the Baby's Sex

Excerpted from
The Mother-to-Be's Dream Book : Understanding the Dreams of Pregnancy
By Raïna M. Paris

During the second trimester a woman's awareness that a human being is growing in her womb can foster great excitement about the sex of the baby. If the mother-to-be has issues regarding women or men that have not yet been resolved-such as "men are violent" or "women are bossy"-then dreams about the sex of the baby could flourish around that time. These dreams can be an opportunity for the mother-to-be to take a good look at her beliefs about men and women and come to some resolution or acceptance about the matter.

So even if all you are interested in is the sex of your baby, premonition dreams have other valuable components. Not only do they answer questions concerning the gender of your child, such dreams also create an opening for healing to take place on a psychological and emotional level. They enhance the contact between the mother and the child, creating a pathway through which vital information may be passed.

Lucy is the mother of three boys, and psychic dreams relating to the gender of her baby were a normal second-trimester occurrence during each of her pregnancies. Because the sex of the baby was integrated into her dreams, Lucy did not make anything of it until the doctor told her she was having a boy and she remembered that she had already dreamed about it. As she said to me in our interview, "It was amazing to realize that part of me already knew my baby was a boy." The full impact of the dream came only with the actual birth of her baby when she saw that he looked exactly like he had in the dream.

Lucy's third pregnancy was a little different. Both she and her husband did not want to know the sex of the baby because they were hoping that after the birth of two boys they would have a girl. Much to her surprise, during the pregnancy with her third child, Lucy had a dream that revealed to her that her final offspring would indeed also be of the male gender. The comfort and acceptance emanating from the dream helped Lucy accept the gift of her third child even though it was not a girl. The next two dreams are from her first and third pregnancies.

In the dream, I am in a hospital room. I have just given birth to my baby. It is very clear that he is a boy. I think to myself that my baby reminds me of an ex-boyfriend of mine, my first love who was from South America. I marvel at the baby's size. He is stocky and quite strong looking, a little football player in the making. My husband and I are getting him dressed to go home from the hospital. He has a lot of curly hair and he is rather dark. His feet are so large that I put toddler-size sandals on him to go home.

Lucy explained to me afterward that when her son was born she remembered this dream because he looked identical to what she had seen while sleeping-dark-skinned and chunky. Since both Lucy and her husband were fair-skinned, it was an odd vision to have. She felt strangely relieved when the baby turned blond a few weeks later.

Somehow, her baby's dark curly hair brought up a lot of feelings for her about an ex-boyfriend, a fellow who would pop up in her dreams at odd times in her life. The psychic dream not only revealed the sex of her baby, but also gave her the opportunity to look at some of the lingering beliefs she had about men, triggered by the resemblance of her baby to her ex-boyfriend. Though Lucy had been madly in love with this man, it had proved to be a very dysfunctional and abusive relationship. Because of this, Lucy started to see men as a dangerous and untrustworthy breed. When her baby turned out to look just like the type of men she shunned in her waking life, it forced her to deal with the anger and resentment she still held toward her ex-lover.

This psychic dream was incredibly accurate not only in its depiction of what the baby would look like when it was first born, but also in how it reminded Lucy of her ex-boyfriend. Thanks to the dream, Lucy was able to eradicate the subconscious beliefs that might have negatively impacted the way she raised her baby boy. She embarked on a healing path because she did not want her maternal love to be tainted by the negative feelings her passionate and painful history with that man had generated.

In the psychic dream about her third baby, the feelings that surrounded the dream were very evocative. Lucy's unconscious displayed a very delicate and private emotional tone that was wonderfully expressed by the symbology of the dream. Lucy explained to me that she and her husband did not want to know the sex of the baby, but that she assumed she would have a dream about it simply because it had happened for both of her previous pregnancies. She was not too surprised when it happened six months into the pregnancy. What was fascinating to her was the accuracy of the feelings she was having in the dream. It was as if the dream knew better than she did what her feelings were. The dream really helped her that way. She was able to deal with her emotional state much more easily once the dream brought it to her conscious awareness.

I am at a make-believe park. My other two boys are not with me. I am holding my precious new baby underneath the swing set. People, family and friends, are all coming up to me and asking if it's a boy or a girl. I tell them it is a boy. I get a lot of sympathy from everyone. They are all disappointed that it is a boy, and they leave me under the swing set. I feel very quiet and protective of my baby, relieved that they are not going to fuss and make a huge deal out of it, which they would have if it was a girl. No pink dresses and no pink parties, just me and my baby. I am filled with love for my baby. I don't want anybody around. I wake up knowing that I just had a psychic dream about the sex of my baby.

In this touching dream, Lucy's feelings about having a boy are revealed. There is a sense that she must protect the baby from everyone. She is almost hiding under the swing set. Lucy is alone with her baby. They are in a very private world with no one else; not even her other children are there to disturb them. In the dream, she is glad that the people go away when they find out it is not the much anticipated girl. The mother much prefers the calm of their isolated bliss to the pink fuss that would have occurred with the birth of a girl. There is a distinct overall feeling of contentment, acceptance, and even satisfaction about the outcome of the pregnancy, which shows a mother's love for her baby, regardless of its sex.

Psychic dreams about the sex of the baby can involve other distinct elements besides holding significance about our beliefs toward men and women. In some cases the woman will feel the dream as a nudge from the baby, showing the mother-to-be that she needs to make space for its arrival. This often contributes to a mother's urgent desire for a new home, a more comfortable nest for herself and her expanding family.

Holly's dream convinced her that she would have a girl, but it was only after a closer examination that she acknowledged the ensuing role the dream had played in her decision to move to a new house at the end of her second trimester. She found herself knee-deep in boxes right until the last minute, which is not what she expected at all.