Is your fixed version of another truly secure? The distress of a relationship gone wrong is a difficult emotion to overcome and one that can have lingering effects. As much as we wish to alleviate the pain of a broken hope, true healing cannot begin until you can move on and come to terms with the situation. It is important to remember that the ability to heal and make progress is within yourself. To move forward, start by accepting the situation for what it is and open yourself up to the opportunity to learn from it.
Throughout any relationship, much of our security is found in the trust that we build with one another. As trust strengthens, so does the connection that links two people together. However, when a relationship begins to erode it can threaten the feeling of safe refuge we presumed to have in the relationship. This perception of insecurity may leave you in a state of fear or hopelessness. Breakups can cause a shaky foundation of self-worth and well being.
Continue building a foundation of security by reminding yourself that your worth is not dependent on someone else's approval. Acknowledge your emotions without attaching a particular judgement to them. Do not discredit your feelings or downplay your experiences. Consider accessing a support system of friends and family who can demonstrate the validation and empathy you need. Try to remember that being alone is not indicative of loneliness or lack of acceptance.
Distract yourself from engaging in ruminating thoughts that are counterproductive to your growth. Indulge in activities that bring you joy and renewal. Writing or painting can help create a healthy outlet to express your feelings. Identify hobbies or passions that can be fulfilled independently or in group settings. Resign from self-blame or guilt in order to allow yourself the space to grow. Exercise, yoga, or meditation may contribute to the awareness of a creative capacity within yourself.
It can be extremely difficult to move forward when the distraction of nostalgia attempts to block the path of progress. The accurate understanding that this experience is an act of sentiment and a part of personal maturation is important in making progress toward healing. Reframe moments of hesitation as moments of potential exploration.
Remember that moving on does not mean reshaping your identity narrative or deleting all of the good memories from your relationship. Instead, focus on the newfound sense of freedom that is made available after you take control of the process of moving on. Surround yourself with positivity and find comfort in the idea of progress and change.
Be kind to yourself. Envision the phases of healing as a journey composed of multiple destinations. Trust your intuition and reflect on the moments through which you can observe life’s gifts. Finally, recognize that as you move forward you move closer to a stronger, more secure self.
Recommended Comments
There are no comments to display.
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now