Explosive Behavior in 7-Year-Olds: What Parents Need to Know

It can be a difficult situation when children start to display explosive behavior. This is especially true for parents of 7-year-olds because this is a difficult age as children move away from childhood and into puberty, when hormones and emotions can reach a tipping point. Dealing with explosive behavior can be particularly challenging as malicious intentions may not be displayed, yet the harsh reality of the episode remains. If you are struggling to potentiate positive responses to these outbursts and need advice on how to address them, read on for what parents should do.

First and foremost, the way that parents respond to their child's outburst has a great effect on their behavior. It is important for parents to understand that their child is not trying to be difficult, aggressive or showing malice; rather most 7-year-olds who engage in explosive behavior do so out of frustration, confusion, or even as a cry for help. Therefore, the first and arguably most important part of dealing with your child's explosive behavior is being able to remain calm yourself. Consider taking some time to slow down and focus on breathing. You might also want to consult a therapist or behavioral consultant to learn better ways to manage your own emotions. Remember, anger and yelling will only escalate the situation, while patience, understanding and an open ear can help diffuse and lead to a peaceful resolution.

In response to your 7-year-old displaying Explosive behavior, communication is key. Speak to your child in a supportive and constructive manner versus raising your voice. It is also important to focus on active listening. By providing your child with a safe space to listen and voice their grievances or struggles, you can show that you understand why they may be behaving in this way and provide gentle guidance to help them manage these feelings in in a more appropriate manner. Open conversation is also critical to getting to the root of the issue. Ask straightforward yet non-accusatory questions to get a better grasp of what is going on and provide redirection versus handing down punishment. Children of that age are still developing emotionally, so it is essential to present them with constructive responses and guidance to effective handling of their feelings.

Note that there may be a plethora of underlying issues leading to explosive behavior. While it is natural for children to have moments of limited emotional regulation as they grow and mature, there are other factors to consider such as sleep deprivation, inadequate nutrition or medical issues that could be causing disruption in the child’s balance. Taking them to the doctor will help diagnose any medical issues that may need to be addressed. Additionally, be mindful that they are likely to be experiencing high levels of stress which can manifest in a variety of behaviors. Inquire into what is stressing them, work on resolutions together, and provide age-appropriate coping mechanisms to counterstress. Teaching your child practical strategies like distraction, deep breathing, and proper problem solving for the case may help.

It is quite possible that outside influences like TV, movies or social media are contributing factors. Excessive amounts of media consumption can cause misunderstanding, desensitization, distorted values or increased aggression. To counter this, track your child’s media consumption including what types of shows they watch, how much they engage with media, and how they talk and make decisions. A valuable alternative to media consumption is encouraging your child to participate in sports and physical activities, as well as engaging in constructive activities such as extracurricular activities or classes. This can help build their self-esteem, teach valuable lessons and provide healthy outlets to expel their energy.

Finally, pausing to reflect on the day’s events can help provide perspective and understanding of the larger picture. Keeping a daily diary and being aware of potential triggers that could steer your child towards an explosive state is a great way to get to the crux of the situation. Keeping track of the length of outbursts, frequency and magnitude can provide insight into the root causes and is helpful for reviewing progress. This will also help you acquire and master the skill of empathizing with your child and understanding the motivations behind their outbursts.

Kids will express their feelings and frustrations in a variety of ways, but explosive behavior in 7-year-olds often results from a feeling of powerlessness due to their lack of skills or resources to properly handle their emotions. As a parent, it is important to remain patient, understanding and supportive when addressing these behaviors. Through open communication, support, boundaries and a united front, you can guide your 7-year-old and establish an environment where respect and acceptance are the norm. This will teach your child that expressing their emotions, despite the uncomfortable or embarrassing nature, is acceptable, and will empower them to pursue positive changes in their behavior.