The sun was rising over the horizon—the first in a long row of new days filled with possibilities and potential. A family, broken and scattered, was coming together to make the best of it. Across two separate households, they had come to understand that blending families was possible but not without hard work, negotiation, and understanding.
Navigating parenting and stepparenting roles was being done one step at a time, both literally and figuratively. Matters were made more difficult by the pandemic, forcing families apart when they were just beginning to reunite with one another. With each passing day, this family must find ways to learn about each other, create structure and consistency for the children, and manage their expectations of each other.
There are a few key points to keep in mind when it comes to blending families. First and foremost, respect is something that cannot be overstated. Families that are able to accept one another from different perspectives and backgrounds tend to fare much better than those who do not. Secondly, communication matters. The use of language can have a huge impact on how others respond and understanding what works for each family member can go a long way.
Thirdly, set the right expectations. Kids will often act out or rebel when they feel a lack of structure or consistency. You may find they need more attention or appreciation than they’ve been getting until now. It’s important to be realistic and communicate clearly with each other to ensure each family member is comfortable and heard.
Fourthly, recognize that bonds take time to build. Change can be tough, especially when introducing a new family member into the mix. That doesn’t mean that it can’t work—it just means it will most likely require extra patience and effort. Lastly, prioritize the wellbeing of everyone. The power of parents lies in their ability to support their children in growing and thriving in their environment. In addition, parents need to take care of themselves in order to be their best for the children, which includes setting boundaries and taking time for themselves.
Creating a harmonious blended family is an ongoing journey with ebbs and flows. As the sun rises every morning, so comes a brand new opportunity to develop and nurture connections between one another. With open minds and hearts, everyone can work together to create the safety and support blended families need to thrive.
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