The Worst Form of Payback Is Not Having Any

It's an unfortunate situation we've all gone through at some point with a best friend: they copy everything you do—from the music you listen to, to the clothes you wear, and the people you hang out with. It can be incredibly irritating for those on the receiving end, but sometimes the best way to make someone regret it is not to do anything at all.

One instance I remember very distinctly from my teenage years involved my best friend and I. I had been deeply into motorcycles at the time, and she had purchased a scooter after seeing me race one in the local track. After weeks of my trying to convince her that it was too dangerous for her to ride on the track and even suggesting she take classes instead, she insisted on competing alongside me. And sadly for her, she ended up suffering a few broken bones as a result of getting too close to my bike during a race. My plea for her to come back didn't work; instead, she quickly moved away from me and became distant.

It was then I decided to use the silent but powerful approach. Instead of simply ignoring her or avoiding her altogether, I took the time to plant myself in locations where I knew she would eventually find me. Whether it be playing my favorite game in the rec room or walking around the mall just aimlessly browsing, I set myself up as if I hadn't suffered an altercation with my best friend. By putting on this persona—like even if I wasn't present, someone would perceive me in that exact same manner—I put myself in the spotlight without actually speaking.

Sure enough, after just a couple of days, I noticed that my former best friend had started lurking around in the same places where I had set up camp. I could tell by her expressions and body language that she was regretting her decision to lash out and try to replicate whatever it was I was doing at the time. It's far from a perfect solution, but in situations like these, the outcome you get is usually better than what you expect when opting for the silent treatment—which often serves to only create an isolated rift between two people.

What seemed like moments ago was now weeks of everyone around us seeing us in a more mature light since our dispute had already taken shape. It's funny how a simple gesture of basic respect and understanding can create miracles and lessen unwanted rivalry in no time. And that's exactly what happened with us—we weren't exactly on good terms anymore, but there was a newfound respect that replaced our previous toxic relationship.

I know it seems like I gave her this silent punishment but letting her realize what she had done coupled with having me around invariably felt like the best form of payback imaginable —and in the end brought us even closer together than before. Though respecting other people's choices is important, standing your ground and letting someone learn your boundaries without directly involving yourself can help them recognize their bad decisions and make them regret what they did —without feeling overtly attacked in the process.